Real Mom's Summer Passport Information & Links

Hey, All!  We are wrapping up our spring semester at Real Mom's but there is a ton of fun to be had together with our kids, as families or solo with our kiddos!  Please read below and follow the links for all the information, guides, suggestions and dates for a TON of local and regional activities and things to do and see.  

Summer Passport - Click here
Animal Fever - Click here
Career Day - Click here
Too Hot!  Stuck Inside? - Click here

Summer Park Dates
We will be meeting one Tuesday a month for a park play-date during the summer months at these locations:
May 20th - Fossil Creek Park
June 17th - Lee Martinez Park
July 15th - Gardens on Spring Creek
August 19th - City Park


Happy Summer!

Knowing you are LOVED and ACCEPTED 

Scriptures for Renewing Your Mind with Truth

Notes from the speaker Kelly Kuppinger on March 4th, 2014

Our thoughts must be governed by Truth (not feelings):

Proverbs 23:7 “For as he thinketh in his heart, so is he.
Proverbs 14:12 “There is a way that seems right to a man, but its end is the way to death.”
Romans 8:6 “The mind governed by the flesh is death, but the mid governed by the Spirit is life and peace.

Agape Love:

Romans 12:2 “Do not conform to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God’s will is- his good, pleasing, perfect will.”

John 3:16 “For God so loved the world, that he GAVE His one and only Son that whosoever believed in Him would not perish but have everlasting life.”

Romans 8:35-38 “Who shall separate us from the (agape) love of Christ? Shall trouble or hardship or persecution or famine or nakedness or danger or sword? 36 As it is written:“For your sake we face death all day long; we are considered as sheep to be slaughtered.”[j]37 No, in all these things we are more than conquerors through him who loved us. 38 For I am convinced that neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons,[k] neither the present nor the future, nor any powers, 39 neither height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God that is in Christ Jesus our Lord. 

Romans 5:8 “But God demonstrates his own love for us in this: While we were still sinners, Christ died for us.”

3”All praise to God, the Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, who has blessed us with every spiritual blessing in the heavenly realms because 

we are united with Christ. 4 Even before he made the world, God loved us and chose us in Christ to be holy and without fault in his eyes. 5 God decided inadvance to adopt us into his own family by bringing us to himself through Jesus Christ. This is what he wanted to do, and it gave him great pleasure. Ephesians 1:3-5

Dwelling on Christ’s love and acceptance (not man’s) brings freedom, confidence and joy:

Isaiah 2:22 “Stop regarding man in whose nostrils is breath, for of what account is he?”
Proverbs 29:25 “The fear of man lays a snare, but whoever trusts in the Lord is safe.”
Galatians1:10 “Am I now trying to win the approval of human beings, or of God?Or am I trying to please people? If I were still trying to please people,I would not be a servant of Christ.”
Matthew 10:28 “ And do not fear those who kill the body but cannot kill the soul. Rather fear him who can destroy both soul and body in hell.”

The Fear of the Lord:

Proverbs 14:27 – “The fear of the LORD [is] a fountain of life, turning a person from the snares of death.”
Proverbs 1:7 – “The fear of the LORD [is] the beginning of knowledge: [but] fools despise wisdom and instruction.”
Proverbs 14:26 – “In the fear of the LORD [is] strong confidence: and his children shall have a place of refuge. “
Ecclesiastes 12:13 “Let us hear the conclusion of the whole matter: Fear God, and keep his commandments: for this [is] the Luke 1:50 “And his mercy [is] on them that fear him from generation to generation.”
Psalms 33:8 “Let all the earth fear the LORD: let all the inhabitants of the world stand in awe of him.”
Psalm 25:14 “The friendship of the LORD is for those who fear him; and he makes known to them his covenant.” Job 28:28 God says- “Behold, the fear of the Lord, THAT is wisdom, and to turn away from evil is understanding.”
Deuteronomy 10:12 – “And now, Israel, what does the LORD your God require of you, but to fear the LORD your God, to walk him, to serve the LORD your God with all your heart and with all thy soul,”

This is a process:

Heb 12:2 “Says he’s not only the author, but the perfecter of our faith. “
Phil. 1:6 “being confident of this, that he who began a good work in you will carry it on to completion until the day of Christ 
Romans 8:1 “Therefore, there is now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus.”
Proverbs 16:18 “Pride goes before destruction, a haughty spirit before a fall.”

James 4:6 “God opposes the proud but shows favor to the humble.”

Romans 5:9 “Since we have now been justified by (Jesus’) blood, how much more shall we be saved from God's wrath through him!”

RENEWING OUR MINDS: STOP, DROP, ROLL AND REPEAT

Partially adopted from “Called To Obedience” by Howie and Dennie Dowell)—this can be applied to ANY CHALLENGE
STOP Recognize that you are believing a lie which can cause sinful behavior (2 Cor. 10:5a). Pray and ask God to show you that your thoughts are sinful before you sin.
DROP to your knees in prayer (literally or figuratively)
PRAY according to Colossians 1: 9-11, asking God to “ fill you with all the wisdom and understanding that the Spirit gives so that you may live a life worthy of the Lord and please him in every way: bearing fruit in every good work, growing in the knowledge of God, being strengthened with all power according to his glorious might so that you may have great endurance and patience.”

CONFESS any thoughts or attitudes that are sinful (1 John 1:9, “If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness.”)
CLAIM the Holy Spirit’s power to overcome the sinful thought or attitude (Phil 4:13) “I can do all things through Him who gives me strength.”
ROLL your fingers through the pages of your Bible to find the Truth. This allows you to:
FORCE you mind to change from the sinful thoughts or attitudes to godly ones. (2 Cor. 10:5 “We demolish arguments and every pretension that sets itself up against the knowledge of God and we take captive every thought to make it obedient to Christ). Watch destructive your self- talk!! Memorize Scriptures
SINFUL THOUGHTS LEAD TO SINFUL ACTIONS
GODLY THOUGHTS LEAD TO GODLY ACTIONS 
WALK ON: Do what the scriptures say.
REPEAT this outline when those same sinful thoughts or attitudes occur again 

Raising Responsible Children

Fantastic talk on the topic or raising responsible children from Sara McConahy at Real Mom's on February 4th, 2014 in case you missed it or need a refresher!

I.      What does responsible mean?

Trustworthy, sensible, mature, reliable, dependable, in charge of, capable of being trusted and morally accountable for one’s behavior are some definitions.

II.    Why be responsible?

Taking it to the heart level, being responsible is a way to fulfill two commands given by Jesus:  1) treat others the way you would want to be treated. 2) Consider others more important than yourself. Being responsible loves God and loves others – two greatest commands given in Matt 18. At the heart of responsibility I think we find sacrifice and integrity – a giving up of self for the better of another. Responsible means you are going to do your chores instead of play. Tell the truth instead of lie. Come inside when I ask instead of when you want, etc.

III.  Responsible Parable…  Responsibility is like an ARM!

Responsibility is like an arm… when a child is born he has arms, but they are of no use to him… yet. He flails and flaps, unable to hold a thing, to push, pull, lift -  do anything. Yet everything is there, in his arm, to one day do all these things and a hundred more. His arm only needs time and experience and the bones will harden and the muscles with strengthen. Then this arm will be useful in all circumstances and able to hold that which is entrusted to him.

We all know that being responsible is a process. This is called raising responsible kids not birthing responsible kids. They don’t come out that way!  This requires seeing parenting with the big picture in mind through the details of life. Raising responsible kids is daily, thoughtful, careful, risk taking, faith stretching work. It will have successes and failures. The when is today, tomorrow and each day as long as your children are in your care. What a privilege to see a baby arm grow into a strong useful one. You and your husband carry a responsibility to raise a responsible child!

IV.   Barriers/obstacles to becoming responsible: With that said – your child is unique! Just as you are unique! Although we can define being responsible with a few specific words, each child will be unique in the ways they process learning and exercising responsibility. You may have a child that embraces and handles responsibility very well. Or maybe not, or maybe they could care less – why are you talking to me about unloading the dishwasher when there are toys to play with!! Maybe: Internal drive to follow rules, be organized, be focused, or maybe they get overwhelmed easily, or forget what you just told them to do because a squirrel just ran in front of them.. squirrel!!  There are so many things that are at play – environment being one, boy/girl, birth order, age, health and disability, strengths and weaknesses. No cookie cutter parenting.  The big picture recognizes that an arm is an arm but the time it takes to fully develop varies.

V.     Helps to becoming responsible:

1.     Modeling: (Toning your arm) Children do what they see more than they so what they are told.

Environment is important.  Even though we are not perfect we need to check and see if there are areas in our lives that we are consistently irresponsible.

-       Are you consistently late, not reliable to the people who are waiting on you?

-       Is your yes, yes and no, no; or do you bail on commitments?

-       Do you follow through on statements/promises (especially with your kids… “I will play with you in just a minute.)

-       Do you and your family do things for the sake of others even when it is inconvenient?

-       Do you work hard?

-       Do you take care of property?

-       Do you spend more than you make?

-       Do you spend your time on facebook/pintrest/blogs at the expense of the things you are responsible for and are a God given priority? 

Do you need to be perfect?? NO and you aren’t going to be! We are in process too and need to rely on the grace, wisdom, and strength given to us through Jesus!

2.     Appropriate level of responsibility at appropriate age: (Picking up a ball and learning to throw)

Teaching children how to be responsible starts with telling them what they CAN NOT do.  I am telling you to give them appropriate responsibility at the appropriate age. Going back to our definitions: your 2 year old is not trustworthy, sensible, mature, reliable, dependable enough to make the decisions they think they can make – YOU ARE – and you need to be the one who maintains responsibility for those decisions and you gradually give opportunity to be responsible as they exhibit ability to be trusted. Responsibility starts with their ability to obey you.

3.     Honesty:   (Bicep Training) Being responsible is being trustworthy. Being trustworthy means you tell the truth. One cannot be responsible and a liar at the same time. Let me encourage you to take lying very seriously in your home. Trust is the foundation of relationship. If you cant trust that your children are telling you the truth, it is going to be very hard to entrust them with responsibility. Be careful of “half-truths”.

4.     Restitution: Exodus 21:33-22:14 gives us a biblical principle of restitution, which is the restoration of something lost, stolen or broken. Biblically it is restoring + some… Being responsible means taking care of property - yours or others.  Another definition: the restoration of something to its original state. Clean up at others homes after play? Clean up after self in own home? Clear plates?

5.     Prepare/instruct/resource:  Nothing is more frustrating than being giving something you are responsible for that you: 1) don’t know why you are doing it. 2) Don’t know how to do 3) and don’t have what you need to do it. Obvious with football that after modeling comes coaching and practice. Give the child a ball and teach the child how to throw! 

6.    Opportunity                 

1.     Sort laundry and/or fold laundry.

2.     Match socks

3.     Clean up room/pick up toys/

4.     Set table/clear table

5.     Help with preparing meals

6.     Put away folded clothes

7.     Get ready in the morning and evening

8.     Shoveling/mowing/yard work

9.     Projects with dad

10.  Cleaning car

11.  Allowance for spending/gifts/clothing.

12.  Own bank account

Hello, wonderful ladies!  This blog post is to share all about the awesome talk that our friend, Lindsey Ray, gave to our Real Mom's group on January 7th regarding ANGER.  All about how it manifests itself in our hearts and ultimately impacts our home and family and best of all - how to battle it!  Thank you, Jesus for the hope that is found in you!

Here are the notes and verses to read and meditate on to help us with this battle!

1. A  little on Anger
      A. Anger is an outward expression of an inner sin that needs to be addressed.
          1. Pride - wanting to be in control of the situation or comparing (I am not as good as so and so or I have it all figured out)
          2. Discontentment - Trial or Waiting on God to answer a prayer
          3. Wrong goals - "Me" Centered and wanting convenience in your day
          4. Fear/Lack of trust in God - Possibly over the hearts of your children or a break through in sin
          5. Claiming perceived rights - Things we think we have a right to but aren't promised in Scripture
          6. Unforgiving hearts - Over anyone and specifically remembering to forgive our children for sin that they caused against us that may have led to bitterness in your heart.
     B. Anger is more than "Mt. Mama" eruptions (when it boils over)
          1. Typically think of "fits of rage"
          2. Can also be resentful attitudes, self-pity, irritability, controlling/demanding actions, unkind worlds, sarcasm, the silent treatment, withdrawing, gossiping/venting, etc.
     C. The consequences of anger affect more than just us.
          1. Cause emotional/physical pain (Gen. 4:6-8)
          2. Leaders to more anger (Proverbs 15:1 and 18, Proverbs 17:14, Proverbs 22:24-25)
          3. Leaves us open to further attack (Ephesians 4:26-27, Proverbs 25:28) - Like a city without walls is a mans heart which is open to attack and Satan does want to get a foothold!
          4. Does NOT result in the righteousness of God (James 1:19-20, 3:17-18) - behavior can and may change but not the heart.
          5. Leads us to isolate ourselves - "secret battle". Satan wants us to be along and open to attack.

2. My Self-Sufficiency Cycle
      A. Starts with Trust/Pride in Self Determination then goes to Walking in your own strength to Anger Trigger to Responding with Anger to Guilt to A vow to work harder.  Circular cycle that can go on and on and on if we are not fighting it and trusting/seeking the Lord.

      B. Problems with this Self-Sufficiency Cycle
           1. Focus is on ME - God allows trials to refine us and make us more like him. They are tools to draw us closer to Him!
           2. Not accepting God's plan for your life.
           3. Battling sin with a sinful nature (Romans 7:18-20)

3. Grace-Sufficiency Cycle
     A. The Hope: Walk by the Spirit (Galatians 5:16-17) through God's sufficient grace (2 Corinthians 12:9-10) This is God's power living in us to battle sin WITH us!
     B. Starts with a Relationship with Jesus Christ and goes to Daily Communion to Growing in Wisdom and Faith to Trusting in God's Plan for Your Life to Preparing the Mind for Action to Accountability to Recognizing Weakness/Pray for God's Strength to Anger Trigger to Resisting the Devil to Trusting that God WILL strengthen/confirm and protect to Giving Thanks
     C. Starts with knowing Jesus and spending time with Him.
     D. Leads us to growing in wisdom and faith (Col. 2:3, 1 Peter 2:2, John 15:3-8)
     E. Trusting in God's Plan (Romans 8:28-29, Jeremiah 29:11)
     F. Prepare your minds for Action (Ephesians 6:12-18, 1 Peter 1:13-14, 5:8-9. Col. 4:2, Philippians 4:8-9)
          1. Identify and confess any root sins
          2. Identify and confess any anger triggers and keep watch for them!
          3. Surrender your day to God - Hid plan may not be your plan.
          4. Pray and mediate through Scripture (Col. 3:12-17, Isaiah 26:3)
          5. Involve a prayer partner
          6. Dwell on good things (Philippians 4:8-9
     G. Recognize your weakness/Pray for Strength (2 Corinthians 12:9-10, Hebrews 4:16)
     H. Resist the Devil (James 4:7) - We have the power of the Spirit in us!
           1. Pray right away
           2. Resist the temptation of reacting immediately
           3. Take a break
           4. Deal with parenting issues right away, tag team if possible.
     I. God will confirm, protect and strengthen (Ephesians 6:13, Philippians 4:13, Philippians 2:12-13, 1 Corinthians 10:13)
     J. We give thanks and grow in wisdom and faith (2 Corinthians 4:14-15, Hebrews 13:15)

4. Other Helpful Tips
     A. Be proactive vs. reactive in parenting
     B. Seek forgiveness from kids/husband
     C. Be forgiving of our kids
     D. Have margins in your life (weekly, monthly, yearly)
     E. Look for hidden idols in your life (perfect home, schedules, etc.). These are things that seem like good things but actually create bondage.
     F. Capture, Confess, Claim ( the power of the Holy Spirit), Transform your thinking, Repeat

5. Couple notes of encouragement!
    A. God can use us no matter our mistakes (example of Saul becoming Paul)
    B. God won't leave us here.  (Philippians 1:6-7)

At our January 21st Real Mom's Meeting!

Janice Powell is the mother of three sons and no daughters.  She has a heart for the so close yet so challenging relationships between a daughter-in-law and a mother- in-law.  In difficulties, she naturally turns to the study of God’s Word from which the “Let God be Glorified” curriculum was written.  She loves to hear the heart-warming and heart- wrenching stories of mothers and daughters as she teaches through this curriculum.  


Please, join with us as we listen to this gracious lady from Granby, CO.  Refreshment, workbooks, and fellowship provided.   

Love Languages

We had the privileged of hearing Theresa Fightmaster speak at our last meeting on the 5 Love Languages, an inspired talk from the book, The Five Love Languages of Children by Gary Chapman and Ross Campbell.  Each person receives love differently, so it's important to figure out what really fills your husband or kiddos "Love Tank."  Each person will probably need all of these Love Languages to be spoken to them, but some will be more important to the individual then other ones.  Here is a list below:

5 Love Languages

Touch (Describes your child/husband):
Receive hugs, kisses, high fives, cuddles, asks to be carried, wrestling, tag, climbs in your lap.

Words (Describes your child/husband):  Likes for others to tell them they did a good job.

Quality Time (Describes your child/husband):  Loves to do things with you: watch a movie, yard work, go out to eat, run errands, play a game.  Tries to get your undivided attention.  Wants to sit next to you or have you watch them while they're playing.

Gifts (Describes your child/husband):  Feels good when someone gives them something.  Enjoys a special present or surprise.  Enjoys birthdays presents, surprise treats, earning a treat, having their favorite food made for them.

Service (Describes your child/husband):  Likes it when people do nice things for them: helping with chores, school projects, driving places, making meals or snacks.

 A child with a full love tank = a healthy, emotionally stable child.

How do I know what my spouse's/child's Love Language is?

1. Observe how your child/spouse expresses love to you.
2.Observe how your child/spouse expresses love to others.
3. Listen to what your child/spouse requests most often.
4. Notice what your child/spouse most frequently complains about.
5. Give your child/spouse a choice between two options.


The 5 Love Languages are a wonderful tool to use in learning to love our family well.  We are so grateful to Theresa for sharing her knowledge with us!  

Wifehood- Sarah Longoria

I.                    Intro- Thank you for having me!  The thought of teaching you all about wifehood is humbling because the only authority on the matter I have comes straight from the Word and what God has taught me, usually through the painful refiners fire.  I will forever be a work in progress! 

A.      Travis and I’s story- Met in junior high. My insecurity during my dad's illness created unhealthy dependence on Travis to meet my needs.

II.                  How God has moved my heart to a wifehood focus instead of a marriage focus.  We think of marriage, in the Biblical sense, as husband and wife loving each other well, which glorifies God.

A.      Our marriages are fertile ground for God’s glory and our growth, but sometimes it won’t come through mutual efforts. The one in our marriages we’re accountable for is ourselves and how we love, regardless of the way we are loved in return.  We are all sinful, imperfect women married to sinful, imperfect men and it is Gospel love alone that gives any of us any hope.  Gospel love is self-sacrificing not self seeking.          

1.      God gives us many directives on how we can best love each other in marriage, and He is certainly glorified when the two people in a marriage are living in obedience to them, but I would venture to say that He gives us far more instruction as individuals on loving Him and others (our husbands being one of the most important “others” we love).

2.      Some of us are married to dynamic spiritual leaders, others of us to men who lead more quietly or who are in a dry place in their walks, and still others to men who don’t know the Lord.  Each of our marriages and husbands is unique (different strengths and weaknesses).No matter who your husband is or where he’s at, you can live in full obedience to God’s calling on YOU to love him with the love the Lord has given you as a daughter of Him!  When we abide, He provides!

a.      1 Peter 3:1-2- “Likewise, wives, be subject to your own husbands, so that even if some do not obey the word, they may be won without a word by the conduct of their wives, ² when they see your respectful and pure conduct.” (be careful of the martyr mentality! Don’t consider yourself better than your husband, that’s pride and that’s sin!)

b.      Matthew 22:36-39- ““Teacher, which is the greatest commandment in the Law?” Jesus replied: “‘Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind.’ This is the first and greatest commandment.  And the second is like it: ‘Love your neighbor as yourself. (When we love God with our whole heart, HE enables us to love our neighbors as ourselves)

c.       Romans 12:9-21 (think specifically about loving your husband as I read this)- “Let love be genuine. Abhor what is evil; hold fast to what is good. ¹⁰ Love one another with brotherly affection. (He is your brother in Christ!) Outdo one another in showing honour.  Do not be slothful in zeal, be fervent in spirit, serve the Lord.  Rejoice in hope, be patient in tribulation, be constant in prayer. Contribute to the needs of the saints and seek to show hospitality (to your husband!). Bless those who persecute you; bless and do not curse them.  Rejoice with those who rejoice, weep with those who weep. Live in harmony with one another. Do not be haughty, but associate with the lowly. Never be wise in your own sight (pride).  Repay no one evil for evil, but give thought to do what is honourable in the sight of all.  If possible, so far as it depends on you, live peaceably with all (your husband!).  Beloved, never avenge yourselves, but leave it to the wrath of God, for it is written, “Vengeance is mine, I will repay, says the Lord.” To the contrary, “if your enemy is hungry, feed him; if he is thirsty, give him something to drink; for by so doing you will heap burning coals on his head.”  Do not be overcome by evil, but overcome evil with good.”

3.      To reiterate what Jason shared last weekend and to echo what Courtney shared in her mom minute, when we abide in the Lord, when we go to Him first for ALL our needs, He is faithful to meet them.  No other person or role can satisfy!  Truly living this frees us to love others without expectation for something in return.

B.      Expectations lead to disappointment when our hope is misplaced on the wrong person/thing, who are we counting on to meet our needs, to fill us?

1.      John 6:35- “Then Jesus declared, “I am the bread of life. Whoever comes to me will never go hungry, and whoever believes in me will never be thirsty.”

2.      John 4:13-14- “ Jesus answered, “Everyone who drinks this water will be thirsty again,  but whoever drinks the water I give them will never thirst. Indeed, the water I give them will become in them a spring of water welling up to eternal life.”

3.      How my expectations of Travis have torn him down instead of building him up.  (how and how much he communicates, his spiritual leadership of our family, his level of helping around the house, the way he parents our kids, etc…)

a.       How does it feel on the flip side of the coin, when someone has you constantly feeling like you don’t measure up and you’re never cutting it, does that motivate or deflate you?

b.      I think it’s easier for us to live in the truth that friends, extended family and even our children are not made to satisfy us, and although we may say that we don’t expect our husbands to fully satisfy us, our hearts often believe differently as evidenced by our struggles in marriage.

C.      Fighting the 50/50, “you complete me” cultural prescription.

1.      Think about the most common reasons people give for divorce.  It’s often about what the other person isn’t doing right or about how the other person isn’t meeting their needs. (if you are sitting in this room and have been divorced, know that God has enough grace to meet you where you are at and grow you from here! There are also cases where a spouse has taken the decision out of your hands and left.  Please know that every women in this room is loved by Jesus right where she is at and every single one of us is nothing without Jesus, we can do nothing good apart from Him.)

2.      “What if marriage isn’t designed to make us happy but rather to make us Holy?”- From Sacred Marriage.  What I would add to that is, what if our greatest joy in marriage can only be found when we stop looking to it and our husbands to fill us up.

D.     How do we get there? NOT by trying harder to be better!  We start, flat on our faces before Jesus, confessing our sin and begging Him to fill us.  Loving our husbands more selflessly will be a fruit of bathing in the sacrificial love of Jesus for us!

III.                Closing: The rollarcoaster journey of our recent decision to move to Switzerland and how God continues to refine me in all these areas.  Please pray for us!

·         I asked Travis if he had anything he’d like to add to what I prepared to share with you all.  I was thinking it might be something profound that I had missed, but maybe profoundly simple?  He said, “a little sex goes a long way to make a man feel loved”. J

                                                      Table Talk

1.      What are some ways you believe God is wooing you to be satisfied in Him alone?

2.      What are some ways you have bought the 50/50, “you complete me” prescriptions for a happy marriage and how is God challenging you to love your husband more selflessly?

3.      Do you have anything to share with your sisters about how the sin of pride has caused you to belittle, nag, or look down on your husband?

4.      How can we be praying for you as a wife?